The Never-Ending Friendship Chili

By Anja Wuolu, College of Saint Benedict

Julianne is laying on the floor scrolling through the endless stream of snow and cold-related cancellation posts. Her phone battery is at 43% and it’s only noon. Mostly it’s just other people in college posting pictures of frosted windows, videos of quickly-freezing boiling water, or screenshots from the campus-wide email. But there’s something good to be found as well: “My cousin got a new puppy!” She passes the phone up to Lucia, who cradles the phone as if she were holding the dog itself in her arms. The couch she’s lounging on teeters a little. The legs are slowly becoming unscrewed, but the four apartment-mates don’t plan on doing anything about it.

“They named her Sage!” Lucia exclaims. Although they’d never met, Lucia follows Julianne’s cousins on Instagram and knows they are avid herb gardeners.

“Chia, let me see,” Olive emerges briefly from her studies for the sake of the dog. She smiles at the picture. “Cute.”

“Whose new dog?” Rosemary yawns, still in pajamas. Her hair is almost as wide as her shoulders and words sound funny from wearing a retainer.

“My cousins’!” Julianne smiles, stretching her arms and yawning after seeing her roommate yawn. “I’m bored.”

“I’m hungry,” Rosemary replies, wandering towards the kitchen. She opens the fridge to find no milk. Her dreams of pancakes, waffles, or cereal were squashed. Settling for eggs, the only frying pan is dirty. The giant soup pot, however, is clean. Couldn’t eggs technically be fried in a pot? Aside from making it harder to flip, wouldn’t it work? She sets the pot on the stove and turns to find the oil.

“Let’s make soup!” Julianne suggests. Lucia starts the dishes, with an unsettling amount of enthusiasm for washing off grime. Rosemary makes tea and checks her email, “one of my professors wants us to send in a reflection about what we would’ve talked about in class today.”

“Oh, fuck that.” Lucia sympathizes.

“That’s lame. Olive, how do you make soup?” Julianne asks.

“What do we have in the pantry?” Olive gets up and scours the shelves, mentally running

through hundreds of recipes. Cans of beans, tomatoes in the fridge, ground beef in the freezer. “We could do chili?”

“I’ve never had chili,” Lucia admits.

“I like chili,” confirms Rosemary.

“How do we make that?” Julianne asks.

“Well, let’s brown the hamburger,” Olive begins to create the dish. She instructs Julianne to cut up an onion and Rosemary to open the cans of beans: pinto, black, and kidney.

“Aren’t there horses called pintos?” Rosemary wonders aloud. “Are those two related?”

“They’re probably both Spanish? Like the verb for paint is pintarand something painted is pintado and it’s probably like a cowboy bastardization of those words,” Olive responds.

“Cowboys spoke Spanish?” Lucia asks.

“Cowboys were mostly Mexican,” Julianne explains, “and like the ‘Wild West’ was part of

Mexico for a while until the US stole it.”

“Vaqueros,” Olive provides the label for Mexican cowboys.

“I guess that makes sense,” Rosemary concludes. They add onions and the hamburger browns in the pot. Olive wonders exactly how to make chili, and adds some seasonings, pretending she knows what she’s doing. From the others’ perspective, she is very wise. Lucia dries the dishes and then washes the drying rack. Rosemary starts writing her reflection.

“Anybody want to write my reflection on how the global climate change disproportionately affects impoverished minorities despite being primarily caused by the wealthy?” Rosemary opens up her textbook, re-reading because she didn’t take any notes the first time.

“No thank you!” Julienne responds cheerily. She gets out a coloring book and some pencils. After the cleaning is done, Lucia sits next to Julienne. “Hand me one of those.” Tearing out a page for Lucia, Julienne continues coloring. The dragon-themed book was a Christmas present last year. Hers is a princess in a tower with a dragon wrapped around the keep. The princess, beautiful, is awaiting her true love. Drawing a speech bubble, she writes “Sal, come save me.” Lucia selects one of a knight is riding on a dragon, flying in the sky and off on an adventure. She takes a pen to add a few details, giving the dragon feminine features with eyelashes and lips. The knight she also makes into a female character, drawing breasts on the armor and rounding her thighs.

“Okay, now it’s just got to simmer for an hour,” Olive announces. She hopes it will turn out, because she hasn’t actually ever made chili without her parents before.

“This is honestly the best chili I’ve ever had.” Rosemary marvels at the wonderful food lain before her. “I could eat it like every day.”

“Me too!” Lucia chuckles, adding a few more oyster crackers.

“Olive, how do you know so much?” Julianne asks.

“Aw thanks you guys.” Olive smiles, sprinkling cheese into her bowl. Everyone eats as much as they want, and the pot is still half full.

“Chilly weather outside, chili food inside,” Julianne smiles, rubbing her belly. They all laugh at the stupid joke.

“Sal’s coming over for supper,” Julianne informs the group, eyes on her phone.

“Oh, cool, we can share the chili!” Lucia says.

“I don’t know if it’s gonna be enough for all five of us,” Olive looks at the pot, “maybe he could bring another can of beans and diced tomatoes from the grocery store?”

“I got peppers, beans, and ground beef. I couldn’t find diced tomatoes,” Sal apologizes.

“Hey, that’s okay, that’s perfect.” Olive puts all of the food together in the pot, reheating the food on the stove.

“Sal-ami! Come here,” Julianne pulls him into a hug. The others in the apartment smile at the sweetness. An hour later and everyone is gathered around the table, eating their fill.

“So, I have something to tell you all,” Lucia says sheepishly.

“What’s that?” Rosemary asks, she puts down her bowl to focus on her friend. Julianne smiles as though she knows what’s coming, “It’s a boy!”

“No. Actually, it’s a girl!” Lucia

“Oh my god congrats Chia!” Julianne beams.

“Jaz is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen, and we met online, and we’ve been talking for five months, and I get to see her this weekend!” Lucia blurts out all at once.

“That’s awesome!” Rosemary grins.

“Chia, I’m so happy for you” Olive says.

“So, what’s Jaz like?” Sal prompts.

“She’s funny, and she’s smart, and she’s so nice.” Lucia looks at them all with more pride than ever before. The five finish their chili and pack up the leftovers. They complement Olive on her culinary wisdom.

“I can’t believe you guys are still eating the chili,” Lucia laughs. It’s Monday night, and the four apartment-dwellers are gathered around the living room playing silly free apps.

“Maybe we could freeze it for a while.” Olive suggests, “I’m starting to get sick of it…”

“Sick of the chili!?” Julianne is incredulous.

“Yeah, plus I have to actually start using my meal plan,” Rosemary tell them.

“Wait, Rosemary, you have a meal plan?” Lucia gasps. “Why haven’t you used it?”

“Well…I didn’t need to with all the chili and stuff,” Rosemary admits. The four clear a space in the freezer to put the chili. The week melts away into finals, and then they all leave the apartment for winter break. Since the fridge stays plugged in the entire time, they don’t worry about the chili. Olive leaves to study abroad and Poppy takes her spot. Poppy finds herself seated at the table in front of a bowl of chili.

“Now you must begin the apartment initiation,” Julianne says.

“You must eat our chili,” Rosemary follows up. Lucia can’t keep a straight face, and cackles at the brand-new but essential apartment tradition

“Okay.” Poppy ladles some of the reheated food into her bowl and takes a seat at the table. The other three follow suit. Poppy’s face changes after the first bite, “This is really good.”

“We know,” Rosemary says.

“Welcome to the family!” Lucia cheers. Jaz, from a video call, cheers as well.

“Jaz you really need to come try the chili,” Julianne tells her. Because Lucia has a car and Jaz doesn’t, visits one way are easier than the other way. Video chatting has allowed her to see the apartment and meet the roommates, but she isn’t nearly as integrated into the place as Sal.

“Sal’s eaten the chili,” Julianne says to Jaz, insinuating that any good romantic partner must meet the rest of the roommates. Poppy chuckles, feeling that she’ll fit in well to this dynamic. Everyone enjoys the chili and puts the leftovers away.

All over the ground. Rosemary looks in horror at the mess she’s made of the chili. None of it is salvageable. Everyone else in the apartment is sleeping. Julianne, Lucia, and Poppy in their beds, and Sal on the couch. Alcohol consumed prior to sleeping means her companions are more likely to stay sleeping than wake up to noises in the kitchen. While she is not wasted, Rosemary’s thoughts flow around her clumsily and her movements are sloppy. When trying to put away the leftover mojito ingredients in the fridge, she had inadvertently moved the chili from the glass container to the floor. No one seems to be waking up, so she quietly tries to clean the whole mess with paper towels and water. An hour passes and the garbage can is full. The floor is a little sticky, but all the glass is picked up and any identifiable signs of chili are gone.

Poppy wakes up and comes to the kitchen for a glass of water. “Why are you still up? It’s three a.m.” She drinks the water and returns to her bed without another word. Rosemary opens the fridge. It’s full enough that the chili could be hiding in there, but her roommates wouldn’t be fooled for long. She looks in the cupboard for the twin of the shattered container. Using spaghetti sauce, she paints the clear sides and top of the container before hiding it in the freezer. That will buy her some time.

“Sick of chili?” Poppy asks, drinking tea and massaging her temple, “Me too. Not that I don’t love it, but we’ve been eating it every other day for three weeks!”

“Yep,” Rosemary looks at her phone, “Gotta go, be back soon.”

“Why is the floor all sticky?” Julianne asks, frowning.

“Weird,” Sal responds, opening the fridge for milk.

“Thank you for the recipe!” Rosemary types to Olive, “My one group of friends will love it! Yes, we’re still eating ours, and it’s really good! Poppy loves it too! Keep learning the local language and gaining cultural experiences and all that!”

Rosemary rushes to her ex, Lavender’s car. Although they don’t regularly hang out anymore, they are on good terms. “Thanks for the lift to the grocery store.”

“Yeah no problem, thanks for buying groceries,” the pair buys all the ingredients used to make the original chili, as well as $20 of miscellaneous groceries for Lavender. Rosemary doesn’t say anything about how $20 is a ridiculous price for the use of her car and kitchen.

“Why can’t you just tell them you dropped it?” Lavender asks, leaning on the fridge and watching Rosemary cook.

“I just feel really bad because it was part of our roommate culture, right?”

“What if I,” Lavender shakes all the canned beans into a colander, “were to spill the beans?”

“Don’t do that, please.” Rosemary knows it’s a bluff.

“Okay. I guess I won’t.” Lavender touches Rosemary’s hair, gently and non-threateningly. Rosemary doesn’t react. As much as she wants to fold herself up into Lavender’s willing embrace, she holds back. There’s no point in going through the rigmarole of romantic and sexual confusion with Lavender again. Lavender doesn’t seem bothered by the prospects of cutting open their emotional scars “Remember when we went to the zoo last summer?”

“Yep,” Rosemary remembers.

“You still never found your jacket,” Lavender recounts the hours they spent scouring the park for the faux leather jacket.

“Yep, and you bought me a new one.”

“I felt bad.”

“Don’t.” Rosemary looks up from the pot to find Lavender’s eyes.

“Okay,” Lavender says, gingerly unbuttoning the top button of Rosemary’s flannel. The contact vibrates through Rosemary’s chest like she is made of butter. “I won’t feel bad.”

“How have you been lately?” Rosemary asks, tracing the tattoo of a rabbit Lavender must have recently gotten on her forearm.

“I like your face,” Lavender responds, grinning. Rosemary’s face uncontrollably smiles, and she hugs her ex, breathing in springy-summery nostalgia of their short and volatile affair. She pulls away to meet her lips. Lavender’s tongue sends her back in time to marijuana, rain, and drinking sex on the beach from paper cups in the woods.

“You’re…nice,” Rosemary says, knowing that she cannot impart all of the emotions she feels into Lavender. The two just don’t quite work, and they know it. Lavender runs her tongue down Rosemary’s neck. Rosemary takes Lavender’s hands in hers and pushes her away for a moment. Lavender pauses and looks at her. Rosemary thinks…maybe in the months of being apart they’ve blossomed into new people. She pushes Lavender’s hands above her head and against the freezer, kissing her. The chili starts to bubble.

Rosemary thanks Lavender, packs up the chili and heads to her apartment. She slides the replacement into the freezer, washing and storing the empty dish. She’s certain her roommates will never know what happened to the chili.

“I’m gonna go see Jaz!” Lucia calls as she leaves the apartment. She’s so happy.

“They’re so cute,” Julianne says, “Poppy’s boyfriend is coming over next weekend.”

“Oooh,” Rosemary says, “he can eat our chili!”

“I love that you guys have been eating this chili for literally months, and no one’s gotten sick,” Poppy says, emerging from the bathroom in a towel. She grabs a banana and a granola bar before going into her room.

“Okay, I have to admit something,” Julianne says to Rosemary, “I got back from winter break first, and when I tried to defrost the chili, I accidentally dropped it and shattered it.”

“Oh my gosh! Me too!” Rosemary admits.

“Sal and I re-made it but yeah that’s why it tasted different.”

“I didn’t notice.”

“Maybe it doesn’t matter that it isn’t the same chili.”

“Just that it’s a communal chili, shared together by everyone?”